Exams, stress & more stress

 

Today has been surprisingly good although I’ve been tired all day which hasn’t been to great. Plus it was a full day at college without any frees, although I had a laugh with everyone which made it feel as though the day was passing really fast.

I have my media exam tomorrow, I’m starting to get really nervous for it I don’t feel prepared at all… BUT I have a free first thing tomorrow which means I can revise then.

I have reached just over 900 entries for my data entry job this month, I’m quite pleased with that considering I have really spent much time doing it.

Me and Scott still aren’t great but things are improving although I have just found out next summer he isn’t going to be around at all, add that to the fact we aren’t going to be able to speak/ see each other for 3 weeks this summer, its just…. We don’t get to spend the time together I would want us to anyways now we won’t get to spend the time we could actually be able to spend together. Its frustrating/ annoying/ upsetting…. I don’t know. But there things Scott wants to do so I can’t get in the way of that. Plus next summer is going to be really important for me because it’s the summer before I go off to uni so it would have been nice to have him around for that, but he’s got things he wants to do so…. These things happen, just can’t focus on them too much until they happen. Plus I was hoping that maybe we could have gone away together as I would be 18 by then but we can’t seeing as he won’t be around next summer and I didn’t want to tell Scott because I was hoping to surprise him bit late for all that now.

Not a lot else to say really, need to catch up on my sleep!

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Major Nerves

I’m really bricking it for today. I just really want to make a good impression. Start at 10am finish at 6pm, if I get the job I start next week, I really need this job!

Found out Scott was taken to hospital last night, I’m really worried about him, because I don’t know what is happening… Although I’m kind of p***** off that he told me he hated this girl called Jazz and that he doesn’t spend any time with her and yet he’s going to the cinema with her, god knows what that’s about (I don’t have a problem with being friends I just don’t like being lied to), plus I try sorting us out last night and he made it all about him again, sometimes I wonder if he thinks I have any feelings too. I really don’t know what is going to happen to us right now, it seems like everything always end up being my fault at the moment and I always end up being the bad person.

Sorry people, needed to vent…

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Perfect Two

I don’t think Scott remembered but today we have been together for 13 months, quite a long time really. Although today has been kind of ruined by the fact that last night we were arguing and now today things have been weird between us. At the moment we’re not even talking, so things really aren’t that great between us and if I’m honest I don’t really know what to do about it.

I spoke to my ex Louis today/ last night and we had a bit of a catch up since we’ve split up we’ve become really good mates. He’s now got himself a new girlfriend and I’m really pleased for him because he’s been through a lot lately and she seems like a really nice girl, so I hope it all works out for him.

College today has felt really long, most probably because I’ve been in a really bad mood all day and I didn’t sleep last night. I had politics and business today. My politics teacher wasn’t in so we had our old teacher and I ended up doing nothing for the whole lesson, probably not the best plan but I really couldn’t be bothered. I had a free second lesson so I just chilled out with loads of people having a laugh, then I had business which unusually seemed to last forever. Then I got to go home, after a little detour to Waitrose.

Right now I’m preparing for this trial I’ve got tomorrow, wish me luck guys… I really don’t know what to expect since I haven’t been able to get very far with many job applications so right now I’m not getting my hopes up too much.

- OVER AND OUT-