It’s been a while

It really has been way too long since I’ve posted anything here…

Well I’m now officially in year 13, I only have 10 months left of college, it’s crazy it really is! We’ve already started applying for uni, my choices have all changed slightly – hopefully going to uni will work out really well well for me and Scott too which will be a bit of a bonus! The whole process is a bit scary and confusing but, and it’s crazy how soon the forms all have to be in.

I’m finally able to drop Politics this year so now I’m down to the 3 subjects I actually enjoy – although I’m not sure if I’ll enjoy media all that much because I don’t really get on with anyone in my class…

It’s Scott’s first day at his college today – I’m really looking forward to hearing how it’s gone!

I am so happy with everything and everyone in my life at the moment, last night I was just sat thinking about how much Scott has changed my life for the better and has helped me achieve so much. We’ve been together for 17 months! The time has gone so fast – I’m really looking forward to seeing him in October again.

There is so much happening of the next year and I’m looking forward to every bit of it. I’m hoping Scott can stay in Cambridge for New Year this year but I don’t know I was hoping to arrange something special for us but I don’t know if I’ll be able to. It will be really good if I can do what I want to but if not I know we’ll still be able to spend time together either in Cambridge or in Dorset.

So far things have really picked up and I am genuinely really happy, I’m so lucky to have an amazing boyfriend, good friends, and a truly perfect family!

-O&O-

So I haven’t written in a while…

I haven’t written here for a few days, maybe even a week. That’s because I haven’t really been doing anything but WORKING, on my odd day off all I seem to be doing is sleeping.

Work is going pretty well at the moment, I’m learning a lot of stuff. The other day I was pus in charge of cooking for a bit – that was pretty fun and I was quite proud of myself because I managed to fill all the orders.

I can’t wait for Scott to get back from Nepal, I’m working on a surprise for him for when he gets back at the moment, hopefully he likes it. I’ve sorted his birthday presents out too so that I can give them to him in person, they are all things he’s said he’s liked so hopefully he hasn’t changed his mind since. All I want is a cuddle from him.

Me and my dad are arguing a hell of a lot at the moment – he thinks he knows everything even when he’s proven wrong. Can’t wait to escape and have some time out with Scott, and be a normal couple!

I’m so excited to be seeing him, and I can’t believe how soon it is. All I have left to do is pack really, and even that is half done! I’ve got my train tickets and everything else all sorted.

- Over and Out -

I can’t believe I’m only just realising this now…

When someone isn’t there to talk to when they would normally be there you start to realise somethings like I did today.

I’ve finally realised that what has happened in the past between me and Scott needs to stay in the past all the people getting involved, and saying things, all the past problems. They all don’t need to be put in the past because that’s where they belong, they don’t need to be brought up in arguments. We have a future together and we can’t let the past ruin that.

When we’re not together I miss all the things you would get in a regular relationship but in some ways the distance is a good thing because we talk more than other people do, we appreciate each other a hell of a lot more, and we definitely appreciate the time we get to spend together a lot more.

I’ve also realised how much I don’t open up to him, he’s said it to me, but when I talk to him regularly I didn’t notice how much I haven’t been opening up to him. It must really hurt him. So when he comes back I’ve made a promise to myself that I’ll open up to him like I used to when we first got back together, I’ll tell him how my day has been, what’s bothering me, and what is going on, I’m not going to shut him out anymore because doing things like that will push him away.

I really can’t wait for Scott to get back from Nepal and for our relationship to be how it should be and for us to be happy, making each other laugh like we used to, telling each other stories and just having a good time.

I know I have a really good loving future with Scott, he gives me everything and more. I love him and care about him and recently I’ve stopped showing that and have started taking him for granted and that must hurt him. I’m going to show him how much he means to me when he gets back and how much I really do value every single little thing he does for me. Also how much I wouldn’t want to be without him and how much I value our relationship. He really is one in a million and I am incredibly lucky to have him.

Someone at work asked me the other day if I think Scott is ‘the one’. I haven’t really thought about that kind of thing before, Scott has always said he wants us to get married and have a family and I’ve always sort of given him the one day answer. But since I was asked that question at work I’ve really thought about it and I actually think he is, I want to have a family with him, get married, live together all of it because he is amazing, he does everything and more, he’s always trying to put a smile on my face and keep me happy. I need to tell him this.

Other than doing a lot of thinking about mine and Scott’s relationship I have just had a chilled out day. I didn’t do half a lot of the things I planned to but I’m one day closer to Scott being back and one day closer to being with him and spending time with him. I really can’t wait to spend some time together, go on our first holiday, see his results, watch films, go on some long walks. It’s going to be amazing.

Back to work tomorrow, I’m looking forward to it. 3 days at work then I’m off on Monday so me and my family are going to Southend on Sea for a day out. It’ll be good to spend some time with  my family because we haven’t done that in a while.

-O&O -

Such a long day!

Today has been crazily busy! Only just realised sitting here now with nothing to do that in total I’ll be working 6 days this week!

I biked to work this morning it was quite nice seeing as the weather was sunny and there was no wind so I got to work quicker than I thought I would. The day went quite quickly really, there was hardly any customers to serve though so we did loads of cleaning type stuff and general tasks that we can’t do when it’s really busy. I blew up 50… YES 50 balloons today (my record is 80). Apparently now I am unfired which is pretty good and I’m being taught how to cook too! I’m looking forward to it. It’s been a pretty good day at work actually everyone was having a laugh and we all got to have lunch together which was a first, Abi told us some pretty funny stories too!

When Dad picked me up after work we went and got a KFC which was a nice surprise. Then Me, my parents and my sister watched the film ‘Grown Ups’ it was so funny I loved it. It’s the first time in ages I haven’t come in from work and jumped straight on my laptop. I missed out on talking to Scott because of it though – although he did leave a message on my facebook and I know he’s having a good time plus he sent me an e-mail which made me smile.

Was really weird not talking to him when I got up this morning on skype, I even got up early like I would usually do – it weird how much your routine can revolve around one person.

Got my day off tomorrow planning on staying in bed for quite a while, then tackling my room and tidying it up a bit, writing some more for my book and maybe some poems, and just generally chilling out.

Time for me to go to bed I think!

- O&O -

Been busy, going to get Busier

I’ve been at work today, I think I could actually get used to being there every day actually. After the rota had been fixed I’m now only off on Thursday for this whole week, to be honest I’m not complaining because it means the time will go quicker until Scott comes back plus I’ll get more money, so really it’s a win win situation. Looking forward to tomorrow – but hopefully it won’t be too busy.

Scott leaves tomorrow, I don’t want to not be able to talk to him for 3 weeks. But I’m keeping positive because I will be seeing him almost straight away when he gets back so there is something good at the end of it. Plus I have loads of things to get ready for when I go to Scott’s, add work to all of that the next three weeks (should in theory) fly by.

Not a lot else going on really…. I just don’t want tomorrow to come because I don’t want to not talk to Scott….

- Over and Out -

Hectic time…

I feel like I’ve been neglecting my blog lately, I’m kind of wondering whether to go back to my old one – just a small town girl, I don’t know why, I guess it’s because there is a lot of memories in that blog and I feel like I’ve lost them since I haven’t been writing in that blog. – If I go back to it, I’ll transfer the posts from this one to that one.

Anyways today has been pretty boring for me and pretty sad it’s getting closer to Scott going away, he’s going on Tuesday so his last day in England for three weeks is tomorrow and I’m hardly going to be able to talk to him because I’m working, more on that later. I’m feeling a bit odd about him going, I know I’m going to miss him even more than I already do anyways but, I guess it feels worse because he’s going to a different country and we won’t be able to talk at all. I need to stay positive though, I have set up a brand new blog so that I can write him a ‘letter’ each day so he can stay up to date with what I’m doing and how I’m feeling when he comes back. Plus I won’t forget anything in my boring life this way, not that there will be a lot to forget!

I was really annoyed earlier I got a text from Bethany saying the work rota had been changed so I’m not having a day off tomorrow, I’m working instead. But I’m not too fussed seeing as I’ll get more money for going in, which means more money for going to Scott’s.

Not a lot else to say really…

- Over and Out -

Nightmare of a day!

As the days get closer to Scott going away, it’s getting even harder to think of him not being there for 3 weeks. Today I did something I promised myself I’d never do, not open up to him but we had a little talk about it and we straightened things out and it wasn’t long until he had me smiling again.

I had a bit of a shock phone call today – I love my job. Basically because everyone wanted the same time off over the summer they can’t afford to keep everyone on and be short staffed so they’ve let me and another person go. It’s really gutting because I really enjoy working there but something else will come up and hopefully it won’t be too long until I have another job again. Plus I’m working there until the 19th August anyway so it should still fill a lot of my summer. This has really promoted me to find out what is happening to do with my data entry job too!

I’ve spent quite a lot of today trying to get some contacts together so that I can really get into the whole poetry and writing thing, I’ve also started my first proper story. Hopefully over the summer I can really produce some written works I am proud of and that other people enjoy to read too! I hope that within my written works I can get across different messages and create different emotions from my readers too. We’ll see how it goes in the future!

You might notice that I’ve added a few pictures down the side of this blog, I thought it needed a little bit of a change so I picked out a few of my favourite photos of me and Scott.

I’m missing Scott like crazy at the moment – all I want is a cuddle and a kiss so that today doesn’t feel as bad as it does right now. But I’ll be with him soon enough, and I’m with him for a really long time too so I can’t wait, it’s going to be truly amazing to see him, and I’ll be counting down the days while he’s away until I get to be with him. Tuesday is really coming round way faster than I want it too.

I had a bit of a chilled out evening watching the back episodes of the undercover boss on 4OD I love that show and can’t believe I watched it for the first time yesterday, I really recommend it to everyone but that’s probably because I’m a bit of a business head. I did get quite a good life quote from one of the episode – Quitters don’t win. I think I’m going to start living by that because it is so true!

- OVER AND OUT -